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Self-Care and Our Best Selves

Self-care and best selves.
I was recently asked to give a presentation at an activity in the community on the topic of self-care. I wanted to focus more on the WHAT versus the WHY, and how we can connect self-care to our best selves! Now, I’d like to share those same thoughts with you.

Fortunately, most of us recognize the importance of self-care.  Unfortunately, that doesn’t mean we are always good at doing self-care or that we focus self-care on the right things to help us reach for our best selves.

What is the right self-care for me to reach my best self?

That’s different for each person.  To find out what it is for you, follow the steps below.

One, pick your top values.

First, look through the list of values found at this link.

Now, underline any values that you connect with.  In addition, add any of your own that you do not find on the list!  Next, narrow it down by picking five that are the most important on that list to you.  Last, write them down in five separate columns on a piece of paper.  For example, some of my top values include love/connection, play/creativity, and learning.

Two, clarify what it feels like.

Under each value take the time to write down what it feels like when you feel those emotions.  For example, when I’m connected to play/creativity I feel happy, content, joy, playful, humor, curiosity, kindness, and connection.

Three, clarify what it looks like.

After writing down the emotions, then write down what it looks like when you are connected to that activity.  Often, the what are activities.  For example, when I’m connected to my value of play/creativity I might do any of the three activities seen on this page: hiking, going to an amusement park, or visiting a zoo.  In addition, I might paint, draw, or play a game.  

Pro tip: when building out this list I like to have things I can do both solo or with others.

self-care best selves

Four, do more of these types of self-care to spend more time connected to your best self!

Because these are things that you have identified that you connect with more or are more fulfilling to you – these are what you should be filling your self-care time with.  Even more importantly, you just created a whole list of things that invite you towards your best self.  Invite your loved ones to make their own lists and make a habit of making what is on this list a priority!

We’re psychotherapists in Weschester, NY.

Visit our homepage at: www.couragepsych.com

self-care best selves